Counting my chickens before they're hatched, plucked and deep fried.

Man, it doesn't take much. A recent note from Sonicbids informing me that my tune Here Comes The Weather was selected by a company specializing in film/TV placement had me over the moon. Naturally, I took it as a sign that I was meant to drink a little too much, so Saturday found me quite hungover, but by Sunday, I was back in proper health and took Catherine out for a bit of wine and a movie.

Obviously, my celebrating ways are a bit premature, since this might all lead to absolutely nothing, but still, to have even the teeniest bit of recognition just felt super, super good.

Of course, given that the US of A and the rest of the world are about to head into a global depression, I'm not convinced that my timing for trying to sell something is all that optimal. On the bright side, though, I'm pretty sure history shows that entertainment does well during tough times, since people are so desperate to escape the real world, so maybe I'm in a fabulous position, after all! 

Regardless, THANK YOU SONICBIDS FOR YOUR SERVICE! You guys rawk and if I ever get even a little bit famous, you guys are getting a major shout out!

The icing on the cake to all this? The Man In Nashville has resurfaced and might just sing one of my tunes! Damn, for an atheist, I feel blessed.


And... action!

After many moons of writing and recording and being rejected, I have finally experienced my first inkling of success. Or, more accurately, my first inkling of an inkling, since my recent notification from Sonicbids was not that someone had bought a tune of mine, but rather had merely agreed to try to sell it for me. Still, I'll take it!

The company that expressed interest in my song specializes in film and TV placement, which would be great for me, since I'm never going to be much of a performer, I don't think. Not sure how long it typically takes for them to place a song, but I'm not gong to be impatient. I'm just stoked that someone expressed some confidence in me. Feels good.

Technical difficulty blues.

On Friday, I headed off to Hyde Street to record the rhythm and drum tracks for the final three tunes of the album. Sadly, I could not use the legendary Studio C, so I booked into Studio D.

D for Disaster.

The mixing console is large and impressive, but under all the gleaming lights and smooth faders are crusty circuits that have seen better days. As a result, engineer Jaime Durr had to spend hours and hours figuring out which channels were clean and which were dirtier than a Tijuana whore. By the time everything was up and running, I was down and out, as were Jaime, Sam and Andy. We soldiered on, got some decent tracks, but did not finish all that we had planned.

On the bright side, we tried Digidesign's Velvet plug-in, which emulates the sounds of Rhodes and Wurlitzer pianos. It's INCREDIBLE. Sam Bevan, who was doing the honors of playing the midi-keyboard, has a Wurlitzer at home and he proclaimed Velvet to be awesome. Even better, guess how much Velvet cost us? $6. Yup, you read that correctly. Turns out you can rent Velvet as a download. God, I love the Internet age!

Also on the bright side, Jaime talked to the studio owner, who was cool, and comped us about five hours. Neverthless, I will not return to Studio D, despite its beautiful room and nice control room. Recording is an iffy process, and there are enough technical challenges to deal with, even without faulty equipment.

Of rights and wrongs. Thoughts on Suzanne Vega's recent post on Measure for Measure in the New York Times.

Back in the '80s, I remember Suzanne Vega's tune Tom's Diner rising from the din of music at the time to remind us all that even in an age of drum machines, synthesizers and other new-fangled noise generators, the human voice and melody remained king. Tom's Diner was so pure, refreshing, an acapella cannon shot of singular vision into the layered complexity that was pop music at the time. So when I noticed that Suzanne Vega had written about this tune on Measure for Measure, I soaked up the article. Much to my surprise, it not only told the story of Tom's Diner, but also how Tom's Diner became the reference track for the engineers who developed the algorithm for MP3 compression. But there was a third theme in the article: that of copyrights.

According the article, Tom's Diner was one of the very first songs to be remixed (some British dudes added a rhythm track to the song) and, as such, kicked off the re-mix revolution. And, of course, the copyright conundrum that followed, which has become the debate of our time (along with whether to bail out a bunch of Wall Street morons).

Personally, I've struggled with copyrights (intellectually, only, since I ain't got much to sell): is it better to aggressively protect your music an bar others from messing with it full stop without permission, or is it better to only worry about those who seek commercial gain? After much mulling, I've finally netted out on the latter being the answer. My feeling is that worrying about everybody is impossible these days, so only worry about the people who have a specific plan for making a buck with your stuff. Otherwise, let it run wild, let people fiddle with it, get involved, promote you. In the end, the more people who are aware of your music, the more will buy it. Which is why I'm opting for Creative Commons, which you can read about here.

Hope I'm not being stoopid.

The last rehearsal.

Yesterday, Friday, I headed off to Lennon Studios at the absolutely ungodly -- and-un-rock-and-roll -- hour of 9:30 AM. Lennon doesn't even open until 11:00! But a scheduling snafu, caused by yours truly, demanded a 10:00 AM start time. So there I was in the Lennon parking lot, where I sipped a Peet's, munched a scone and read about the Wall Street debacle on CNN Mobile. Andy finally showed around 10:45, then Sam, and by 11:45 or so we were making some good noise. And it felt great.

The songs we worked on were The Road Back, Yo Yo and I Got Drunk.

This time, instead of showing up with fully worked out demos, I just showed up ready to explain what I wanted, try stuff and involve Andy Korn (drummer) and Sam Bevin (bassist) in crafting arrangements.

Wow.

I'm never showing up to a rehearsal with a fully worked out demo again. Andy and Sam brought so much to each song. Thank you, guys.

Next Friday, we'll actually record these three songs, and once they're in the can, I will be able to start building vocal and guitar tracks in earnest, since these three songs complete the album track list. Can't wait. I have been dying to get to this stage of the process!

See more pix in Faux Toes!



Mad for Madison! Notes about my second round of brain therapy.

Last week, I was in Madison, Wisconsin, again for further brain therapy, and while the results weren't as dramatic as round one, that was only because I started this second round much better off.

To read about the therapy I received, just go here, which is a link to an old post about my first visit to Madison.

Round Two was different from Round One in that I focused more on my mental processes rather than my balance. What I mean by this, is that, at the urging of Mitch -- the scientist who was helping me and who had the initial idea for the therapy -- I put forth a lot of effort at becoming more body-aware during the therapy. The theory is that by being more aware of how my feet feel, my legs, my hands, etc., I will strengthen the connections to those areas, connections weakened by my fall. Sadly, this means no more visualizing playing my guitar during my home therapy sessions. But hey, if it's the right thing to do, I am all for it!

All this talk and practice of mind/body techniques got me very interested in furthering my ability to meditate. To that end, I bought a book called "Wherever You Go, There You Are", but I also called J, a friend of my dad's and long-time practitioner of meditation to ask him about his technique. J was super cool and very helpful. But, unfortunately, I won't be able to use J's technique while using my Brainport, because he said that trying to balance while meditating is too much. Balance is a rational problem your brain tries to solve, and true meditation is quieting the rational, problem-solving side of the brain, so the two just wouldn't go together. Per J's advice, I will be meditating for 20 minutes a day, every day, in addition to my two 20-minute Brainport sessions. I'm gonna be a Master, no? Hope so.

Tragically, I will have to start my meditation practice tomorrow instead of today, because I woke up with a migraine. Argh.

By the way, I posted pics of Madison trips and my trip to Vancouver to get my Brainport. Please click on the Faux Toes link above (in the nav bar) to see them.


Am I the next Axl Rose?

Alright, a ridiculous comparison, I admit, since Axl Rose is a nobody and I'm a former international superstar, but whatever, the point is clear: I AM TAKING FOREVER TO GET MY ALBUM DONE.

F.O.R.E.V.E.R.

But, as of last week, I can finally say that all the songs are finished. Can Axl say that? Yeah, didn't think so.

Here are the titles, and current song order:

side one
                   
43 @ 22                           

DEMONS & SAINTS        

MONEY

THAT’S ROCK & ROLL

LOVE & HATE

YO YO

THE ROAD BACK

side two

HERE COMES THE WEATHER

INDECISION

WE TELL THE BEST LIES TO OURSELVES

I GOT DRUNK

COMING TOGETHER (BY FALLING APART)

DUST IN THE VINYL

As for musicians, everything is set except for Coming Together and Dust In The Vinyl, both of which I would like to have The Man In Nashville sing, but who might be having second thoughts about crooning both or even one of these songs. Dang.

The deadline? Same as Axl's: end of the year.


Pondering Tunecore vs. Snocap vs. CDBaby vs. Nimbit.

 

As I plot my course to becoming The Biggest Selling Songwriter In All Of History, it crossed my mind that I might need distribution. Not wanting to slum it with so paleolithic a thing as a record company, I have been seeking out alternatives.

There are zillions. Kazillions even. But four stand out, at least for me.

TUNECORE - For broad digital distribution of my soon to be platinum selling albums and singles, this is the service I plan to go with. I like Tunecore for two big reasons: 1) it distributes music to both iTunes and AmazonMP3, along with a bunch of others, all of which I consider to be also-rans; and 2) it charges a fee for the Tunecore service instead of taking a commission.

SNOCAP - Personally, anything associated with myspace doesn''t hold a lot of appeal for me, and Snocap is myspace's music partner. Why don't I like myspace? Because their site is built on the WORST code and, as a result, looks shitty and works even shittier. Fact is, I think myspace is doomed, unless it gets serious about sprucing up its underlying code, and pumping up its 2.0 cred. I mean, compared to Facebook, myspace truly is a joke. One last concern: MySpace Music has been s-l-o-w to launch. Either they're really taking the time to get it right, or, more likely, they're squabbling over who gets the corner office.

CDBABY - I have heard nothing but good things about CDBaby, and if you want to sell a combination of discs and MP3s they are probably the way to go. I opted for Tunecore simply because Tunecore is digital only, and that suited me, since I do not yet have a CD.

NIMBIT - I confess, I just learned about these guys today, but they are damn intriguing, and might win my business, which, as I've stated, will be MASSIVE. Here are three cool things about Nimbit: 1) they offer a direct-to-fans widget, which you can put on your site and offer your most adoring multitudes exclusive content, T-shirts, CDs, whatever; 2) they seem good for both digital and discs; and 3) Robert Plant and Alison Krauss use it! Concerns? Their commission schedule is a bit complex, and I HATE complexity.





"Nice" and "Not selected". Shot down in flames!

Not too long ago, I posted about how I was going to play a song of mine (Here Comes the Weather) for a record producer. Well, he and I never did meet up in person, but I sent him an MP3, and, uh, well, he said it was "nice".

Around the same time, I submitted "Money, Money, Money" to a sonicbids.com opportunity entitled "American Airlines: The Paste Beat Audio Channel". The response: "not selected." Just like the record producer, no explanation, no critique, just pure, plain old, unadulterated rejection.

I suppose I could drive to a Wal Mart, buy a gun and shoot myself, but no... I'm gonna persevere. After all, The Beatles were rejected in their first attempts to crack the biz, so how bad should I feel? I mean, I'm better than The Beatles, right?

Sigh.

Gear review: Digidesign Strike vs. Doggiebox.

If you're primarily a songwriter and know a thing or two about programming drums, you've no doubt fooled around with various drum machines. Take me for instance: For hardware, I've owned a Drumulator, a Linn Drum, and an Alesis SR-16. Lately, though, I've been using two software "machines": Digidesign Strike and the Doggiebox.

Given that Strike costs about $300 and Doggiebox costs about TEN TIMES LESS, this might seem like an unfair comparison. And if it had to do with pre-programmed beats, well, it would be no contest at all, since the Doggiebox offers only kits, no pre-programmed grooves.

But, if you're like me, and want to create your own drum patterns for demo purposes only, so that a real drummer can get a sense of what you're after, then the Doggiebox crushes Strike.

First, they're both buggy, but believe it or not, Doggiebox is less buggy than Strike. For whatever reason, Strike sometimes just won't play what you tell it to. IT'S EXASPERATING, and totally disrupts the creative flow. Doggiebox crashes every now and then, but just hit save regularly, and you'll be fine.

Second, the Doggiebox can programmed much, much faster than Strike. Sure, Strike gives you more control, but in the end, if you're just after a good feel, a lot of Strike's extra stuff isn't that cool.

Third, yes, Strike sounds better, but not ten times better, and besides, what good is all that extra sound quality if the programming experience just positively sucks because of bugs?

Fourth, Strike is massively CPU intensive at higher quality settings, causing my Mac Book Pro to choke regularly. Again, very disruptive.

Fifth, and final, the Doggiebox works without Pro Tools, so you don't have to worry about THOSE FUCKING iLOKs, or having your over-priced Digidesign hardware with you in order to use it.

Seriously, if you're a songwriter and you're tempted to buy Strike, DO NOT. Try Doggiebox first.

PS: This post was "inspired" during a songwriting session last night, near the end of which I was ready to fire a cruise missile at Digidesign. Pro Tools kept hanging, Strike wouldn't work, argh, it SUCKED. Finally, I shut down Pro Tools, fired up the Doggiebox and made more progress on my beats in 15 minutes than I had made in the previous two ours. I am not exaggerating, either.




Back in Madision for more brain tweakage.

Just over a month ago, I first headed out to Madison, WI, to take part in a trial for a new kind of brain therapy thought to help brain trauma victims, such as yours truly.

It worked.

In a big way.

My vertigo was reduced, my twitchiness went away, my headaches have all but vanished, my mood improved. Sadly, over time, the effects of the treatment have worn off a bit -- even though I've been using the Brainport regularly -- so I am back in Madison for another set of treatments. The theory is that this time, on returning home, I will be able to use the Brainport right away so as to maintain the benefits of the treatment, whereas last time, I had to wait a few weeks between treatments and getting my Brainport, which gave my good-for-nothing brain time to slack off and revert to drinking beer and watching TV (or whatever the hell it does when it's not BUSY HEALING ITSELF, YOU HEAR ME, BRAIN?).

Here's a link to an older post still located at my old blog site because I CANNOT figure out how to transfer stuff to this new site.


Sonicbids sounding much, much better.

A little while back I joined Sonicbids, an aggregator service for song contests and the like, as well as a service for connecting bands with promoters and licensing deals. I saw it as a kind of poor man's Taxi, a way to get my songs into the hands of playa's, without having to pony up Taxi's high fee.

Sadly, my early impression of Sonicbids was not very good. A "magazine" I had submitted to accepted my song right away, without even listening to it (I could tell because of Sonibids' stats feature), and after researching the 'zine I bit, I figured it was some kind of shell company set up for money laundering purposes. I wrote to Sonicbids to tell them of the charlatans that were exploiting the Sonicbids service, but the response I got was less than uncool. The Sonicbids team basically said I was responsible for determining whether an opportunity was legit or not. I wrote back asking ARE YOU KIDDING? What's your vetting process, can I get a refund, do you know WHO these guys are? The response: nada. I was on my own.

So it was a HUGE surprise and HUGELY impressive when I got the email below. Give it a read. It's clear, honest and to-the-point, offering an apology, a refund and a committment to improve the Sonicbids process.

THANK YOU SONICBIDS. I WILL BE A MEMBER OF YOUR SERVICE FOR YEARS TO COME. YOU ROCK.


----------------


Hi Jeff,


This is Tony from Sonicbids. I looked further into the hip hop magazine you submitted to.  I reached out to them to correct their use of the dropbox. They were unresponsive, and consequently, we shut down their listing.


Because of this, we will be refunding all bands who submitted to this opportunity. The site credit will show up on your and their accounts in three to five business days.


I also wanted to share our policies and procedures around promoter screening. We did have an initial phone conversation with this promoter, and required him to send us a copy of his magazine (as we require with all magazine listings) before we allowed the listing to be opened. For first-time festivals, we require copies of city permits. For compilation CDs, we require a receipt from the manufacturer and a copy of the CD.


We’re in the process of redesigning our gig listings so they provide more useful information to our bands before they submit. (In your case, if an opportunity comes with additional fees post-selection.) To better-communicate the improvements we’re making to the service, we’ve put up a Builder’s Blog at www.sonicbids.com/buildersblog. Meanwhile, we’d like to offer our thanks for alerting us to this misuse and an apology for not taking a deeper dive into it immediately.


If you have any questions, feel free to contact me directly. My contact info is below.


(I didn’t want to intrude on your blog by posting this publicly, but if you’d like to share this email with your readers there, please feel free to. Thanks again.)


Tony

Why I’m meditating these days. (Attempted murder is only part of the story.)

For the record, I have always been deeply skeptical of New Age medicine. Energy work, pyramid power, cranial sacral therapy, they all just seem like variations on a theme, that theme being snake oil. However, a severe injury from which you just can’t seem to fully recover will open your mind to new ideas, and my mind is no exception. I still don’t buy any of the above, but stuff like yoga, acupuncture and meditation, well, I can see why these things might help.

Take yoga: it exercises your body and mind, and can truly help you relax, no question. Acupuncture? A little mystical, I admit, but when I did it, I felt better and feeling better is the right path toward feeling good. Meditation? Um, this one, I don’t think I can speak from experience yet, despite my many attempts to master it. However, given that using the Brainport requires me to stand stock still with my eyes closed for 20 minutes TWICE A DAY, I’d better get my om on. Not only will knowing how to meditate help make using the Brainport more enjoyable, but also I think it could help with my songwriting and guitar playing.

But there’s another reason I want to learn to meditate. I heard a story from Dad once that has me totally convinced of meditation’s healing powers. It goes like this.

Years ago, my Dad worked for a big investment bank here in San Francisco, and one of his co-workers, whom I’ll call Bob, was married to a woman known to be, um, intense. She and Bob lived is a massive seaside house filled with cats but no children, and one evening Bob came home, called out his wife’s name and… nothing. Mystified, he called out again, poked his head into the kitchen, the dining room, the living room. Finally, he headed upstairs to the bedroom, where on entering he saw his wife standing in the back corner. She had been silently awaiting his arrival all along, gun in hand. The details of their dispute aren’t material to the story I want to tell, but suffice it to say, she was upset enough to shoot him not once, not twice, not three times, not four times, but five times, saving the last bullet for herself. She died, he lived.

In the hospital, Bob awoke to learn that he was paralyzed from the waist down, which was weird because he could “feel” intense pain in his legs. The doctors said he was experiencing phantom pain, and there was little they could do to help. So when Bob was well enough to leave the hospital, he had one goal: to stop the pain in his legs. His quest took him all over the world, from Western practices to Eastern, from fancy drugs to herbs. Along the way, cost was no object; he was willing to pay any price. But despite having all the money in the world, he could find nothing that worked. Until he tried meditation. Only it -- this supposedly hippy/dippy, supernatural mental mysticism -- offered real relief, without the nasty side effects of powerful drugs. Bob was sold, and ever since, he has meditated for several HOURS a day, gaining roughly two to three pain free hours for every hour he meditates. (And I’m complaining about 20 minutes.)

Quite a story, no? Well, what made this especially convincing for me, is that Bob is one skeptical SOB -- just like I am. Yet meditation worked, and worked wonders.

My most sincere hope is that my attempts to meditate, coupled with the Brainport, will help me rid myself of vertigo for at least a few hours a day. Sadly, my mind has wanderlust and resists focus like a duck’s back resists water, so meditation is very, very hard for me. But I am determined to learn how to do it, not only for my overall sense of well-being, but also, as I mentioned before, for my songwriting and my guitar playing.

I think meditation will help my songwriting because one of my techniques for focusing my mind is to work on songs. I visualize a guitar in my hands, try to hear the tones it makes, work through riff ideas, try lyric ideas, think about rhythms and arrangements. I find that this exercise works best when I already have some sort of starting point, as I need a reference note or something to build on. (It’s like relative pitch, I think, which, unlike perfect pitch, means you can only name other notes once you’ve heard a root note, like an E or an A.)

As for my guitar playing, meditation is probably the next best thing to a genuine practice session. In fact, the last time I went in to the studio to do some guitar work, it was for a song I had ‘practicd” while meditating. Amazingly, the session went far better than usual, with me playing more rhythmically and with few muffed chords. Pretty cool.

So there you have it, the story of why I’m meditating these days and what I think I’m getting out of it. As an added bonus, if Catherine ever shoots me five times (and I live), I’ll have a good recovery technique!

Om.

Finding singers.

Throughout this album project, one black cloud has hung constantly over my head: the fact that I can't sing. Oh, I can hit the notes just fine, but I'm not sure you'd want me too. Even with extra reverb, echo, pitch correction and EQ, I still sound no better than nails across a chalkboard. Given this sad state of affairs, I have been desperately worried about finding the right singer for each song. I knew I could count on my friend Toby for some of the rockers, but beyond that, I really wasn't sure what I was going to do. Through luck and a little networking though, I now have just about every tune covered.

My most recent find is a gentleman by the name of Rod Middleton. A fellow copywriter, Rod worked at McCann-Erickson SF when I first started there back in the mid 90s. We knew each other, but we weren't very close, so we never hung out too much, although I did see his band Slender play one night. And truth be told, that performance stuck with me. I remember thinking to myself, "Damn, these guys are good, especially Rod." Well, lo and behold, Rod is now back at McCann, where he works alongside Catherine, and one day, he caught wind of my album project and offered up his pipes, along with a few sample CDs. One listen and all the memories of that long past gig came back: Rod's voice has power, groove and a touch of Molly Hatchet, and I had just the song: "Love and Hate."

Rod and I exchanged emails, I sent him a demo of the tune with me, um, singing, we scheduled time at Hyde Street and then Rod rawked. I mean RAWKED. His vocal is just killer, and totally makes the tune. Thank you, Rod!

Great American music at San Francisco's Great American Music Hall.

Radiant in a red dress and transcendant in voice, Larkin Gayl performed a captivaing set at the Great American Music Hall last week. Like me, although considerably further along and possessed of WAY more talent, Larkin is trying to make it in music, and if her show at The Great American Music Hall is any indication, she will make it just fine. Her voice, her songs, her presence, everything about her not only exudes talent, but also is simply immensely appealing. Go, Larkin!

Trying to let the outside in, and the inside out.

Songwriting is fun, but it's a bit of a mystery as to why I would be any good at it. First, I tend to be distant from others, which prevents me from seeing deeper into people and spotting those universal truths that are the kernels of great songs. And lest you think I'm distant, but perhaps a great observer, I'm not. I've been in situations where I've missed social clues that might as well have been flashing in bright neon.

And what about looking in? Yes, I do that a LOT,  but without a stronger connection to the outside world, what is the point of looking inward? If I spot things about myself that seem interesting to me, chances are they wouldn't relate too well to others. In fact, I know this to be true: I have started numerous lyric ideas that when first shared with others were met with, um, tolerance.

So, I think to become a better songwriter, I have to learn to let the outside in, and the inside out. And I think my injury has helped me to do these things, because it not only broke my shell physically, but it also broke it metaphorically. Really, even though I am still guilty of spending too much time alone and not spotting social clues (like eyes that say, "Christ, you are boring the shit out me!"), I do think I'm improving.

Thinking more about why this might be, I figure it has to do with getting hurt pretty severley, but not so bad I couldn't recover (mostly). Because when you're hurt, as I was, you have to let others in to help, and you have to let them know they are helping. Also, an injury like mine raises the fear of depression, so my doctors had me start going to therapy as soon as I felt well enough to survive the discomfort of the car ride, sitting on a couch for an hour, and thinking really hard. And these two things together -- the breaking of a barrier and the therapy -- have helped me know myself better and know others better. And it is all this new knowledge, I think, that has lead to the outpouring of songs since my accident in 2006.

Anyway, that's my theory. Now if I could just finish some of those songs!


Songwriting and how to deal with the despair of infinity.

I first heard the phrase "the despair of infinity" from Catherine, who said it as I was standing before a wall of wine in a supermarket and trying to decide what to buy. Kierkegaard came up with the phrase, and in my opinion, if captures the essence of songwriting perfectly. I mean, there are so many ways a song can go, both in words and music; further, until a song is burned into bits and released out into the world and heard by enough people for there to be general agreement on how it goes, it can be changed. And this overabundance of choice is murder. I mean, I'm glad the songwriting canvas in big, but does it have to be so huge?

Perhaps if I were a highly confident, decisive soul immune to insecurity and sure in my convictions, songwriting would be easier. But I am not. I am tortured at the thought of having to COMMIT to much of anything, and songs are especially tough. Worse, I constantly second guess my ideas, which means that pretty much every song I've ever written is vulnerable to revision, especially since not a single one is "owned" by the public consciousness and can be changed, without anyone caring a whit. So until I'm a mega superstar, famed far and wide, I will fiddle with my songs to my heart's discontent. And I will suffer the despair of infinity every time I do.

The latest song to plunge me into this unique mood is Demons and Saints. I first wrote this tune over a year ago, but as with so many songs of mine it is neither a number one Billboard hit nor even recorded, and thus prime flesh for my fickle fork. As of today, I am happy with the arrangement, but the words in the verses, well, I've decided they suck. Consider:

"There was a time when I had dreams
I had hopes and I had fears
I could walk on life's balance beam
Without falling into tears"

"Life's balance beam"? "Falling into tears"? Somebody shoot me. I mean, those are terrible. But every time I attempt to rewrite them, my mind wanders off down one path, then another, then another. There are just too many choices. What to do? Well, I've found that contrary to so many writers, I need to know what I'm writing about before I start. I can't let a song guide me, I have to guide it. Just the way I am. So, with this song as with so many others I have worked on, I have taken a step back in order to write a single line describing what the song is about and paste it to the top of my lyric sheet. In this case that line reads:

Sometimes your bad memories start to outnumber your good ones and there's little to nothing you can do about it.

And this is how I will beat the despair of infinity. Not with a line of something illegal, but with a line of words. It's worked before, I hope it works again.